Denialism

Who Steals a Kindergarten Bunny?

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by

MarkH
in

I have trouble believing this, but animal rights extremists have apparently stolen a kindergarten bunny.

Students at the Community Building Children’s Center arrived at their downtown preschool Monday morning to discover that their pet rabbit Sugar Bunny had been kidnapped over the weekend. Teachers found anti-circus flyers in his hutch.

“Somebody stoled him,” said five-year-old Zion. “I’m sad.”


How do they know it was them? Apparently they left their calling card – anti-circus literature:

The half-dozen flyers left behind advertised protests against the Ringling Brothers Circus, which was in town Sept. 20-23. The flyers showed a picture of a forlorn-looking bear, trying to escape underneath the bars of its cage. Animal rights groups PETA and the Northwest Animal Rights Network (NARN) were listed along the bottom.

I can just imagine the liberation of this 8-year-old, probably overweight, pet-bred bunny into the wild. What do you guys think the survival time would be? 2 hours? 4? Morons. I wonder how could anyone be so stupid, but then I realize, oh yeah, it’s animal rights extremists.

Comments

  1. Ted

    A five year old named Zion? Ouch.

    Now I’m sad too.

    Reply
  2. Rev. BigDumbChimp

    Ummm Spiedini di Coniglio….yumm

    Oh wait. Damn that’s rough. What next “Free the goldfish”.

    Municipal ponds and city lakes filled with the rotting dead carcases of goldfish across the country.

    Score one for Animal rights.

    In your face kindergartens!

    Reply
  3. Deepsix

    Animal rights fanatics are just another form of extremists on the other end of the spectrum.

    Reply
  4. IanR

    But at least he’ll die free, not stuck in a cage! I think I’ve finally figured out the best argument for creationism – people are far too stupid to be the product of a process like natural selection…

    Reply
  5. kevin

    Animal rights fanatics are just another form of extremists on the other end of the spectrum.

    I think I can shorten that for you:

    Fanatics are just extremists on some end of the spectrum.

    Reply
  6. vhurtig

    Are they goona ship him all the way back to Europe so he can be in his true natural habitat? The stupid truly does burn.

    Reply
  7. Evinfuilt

    Poor lil Bunny wabbit…

    They killed the Wabbit! Killed the Wabbit!

    Reply
  8. Nicholas Svara

    As with all stories of this kind, the first thing I thought was, “Man, I hope nothing like that ever happens here.” Then I clicked on the link. My family probably drives by that daycare at least three times a month…

    Of course, I suppose it shouldn’t surprise me. Spokane is well-known for our Labor Day Weekend event, “Pig Out in the Park”, where many restaurants put up tents so people can try out their wares. Naturally, it’s usually also a militant animal rights activist rally.

    But as furious as I am about the situation itself, one part of the article you didn’t quote really got me mad:
    “A PETA spokeswoman, however, said that stealing a pet bunny is not something the group would endorse.”

    Later, the same PETA spokeswoman said under oath that she was a man, the sky was usually green and grass was usually a bright pink, and that the Roswell UFO was in her backyard. Lying sack of…

    Reply
  9. John McKay

    You will notice that the PETA flak didn’t actually say that they didn’t do it.

    What always strikes me about things like this is that they are completely ineffective. You pointed out that they probably sentenced the bunny to a quick and frightened death. They also hurt their cause more than help it. Have they gained any supporters by making a class full of pre-schoolers cry? I was immediately reminded of Steve Irwin’s death. After he was killed filming a stingray, “fans” went out and killed stingrays. I can easily imagine some nut deciding to stomp on bunnies “just to show those animal rights nuts”

    As another famous bunny put it, “What a bunch of maroons.”

    Reply
  10. PuckishOne

    Ah, more fun from my great state.

    I’m sure these same activists will be more than happy to make a future presentation to the 5-year-olds about the natural death that Fluffy died when he was eaten by an eagle moments after being “liberated” and why it was better than allowing him to live out his days in a cage, fed regularly and petted by adoring children. I’d especially like to hear their tired explanations of how even animals that have been domesticated for centuries are somehow still “wild,” and I bet the kids would, too!

    Reply
  11. vjb

    Just saw the great zombie movie ’28 Days Later’. Way to go, animal liberationalists!

    Reply
  12. kevinj

    parts of the uk are still suffering after animal rights activists “liberated” mink from fur farms. Great move that, releasing a foreign predator into the ecosystem.

    Reply
  13. G. Williams

    This is, after all, the same state where reportedly someone “liberated” supermarket lobsters into Puget Sound…where the water is too cold for them to survive.

    I remember finding some obviously former pet bunnies in a park on Whidbey Island, and hearing at least one owl in that park that same weekend. I’m betting that owl dined really well for a while.

    Reply
  14. Janine

    Yeah! This will teach the five years to connect the oppression in the classroom to the oppression in the circus. And while you are at it, no milk for your cookies! The kids have to learn the proper way to live their lives.

    Reply
  15. Justin Moretti

    Stupidity.

    Sometimes I suspect the animal rights extremists are people who have learned to hate their own species.

    And to stop thinking.

    Reply
  16. Gray Falcon

    There is some question as to whether a rabbit can make a good classroom pet. A sensitive ten-pound herbivore and several grabby five-year-olds doesn’t sound like a good match. That said, a real rabbit lover would probably have tried to educate the teachers, explaining the basics of bunny care and behavior. (Check out the House Rabbit Society if you want to learn more) Now, they probably won’t be taken as seriously, thanks to this incident.

    Meanwhile, it’s likely that a rabbit who believes that food comes in bowls and water in bottles is trying to survive in the wild. Few things are as dangerous as well-meaning ignorance.

    Reply
  17. Ex-drone

    The pre-school insurgents have all the philosophical depth of Watership Down.

    Reply
  18. Iggy

    Each day, when I go to work, I pass by a large patch of grass (with a few shrubs). That patch is the home to a few families of rabbits.

    One day, I noticed a special rabbit. It was black (the others are brown) and larger than the others. I figured it was a domestic rabbit that was abandoned or escaped.

    Every day, I would see that rabbit on the grass when I passed by. Until one day, when it was hit by a car. (I found the remains at the side of the road.)

    Don’t underestimate the survival capacities of a rabbit. Even the ones that have never been out of their cage will search for edible plants when they get the chance.

    Reply
  19. Deepsix

    “The pre-school insurgents have all the philosophical
    depth of Watership Down.”

    I remember seeing Watership Down in the theater as a small child. My mother thought it would be a great cartoon for young children. You know, cute cuddly bunnies and all. I still wake up with nightmares.

    Reply
  20. Jorge Gajardo Rojas

    I recomend to activists read Animal Farm from G.Orwell to see that animal also when have the power establish rights against human being.Many Napoleon are in some animals as Pull Bitt dogs who hurts or muder kids in some citiews around the world.

    Reply
  21. Deepsix

    I think I found out what happened to Mr. Snuggles: http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/09/28/rabbit.dumping.ap/index.html

    Reply
  22. Steven

    Knowing teachers as I do. It is far more likley the rabbit died and the school, unwilling to pay for a replacement have blamed the rabbits absence on mythical animal rightists. Teachers will always lie to children as a first resort.

    Reply

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