You say pranic, I say panic–let’s call the whole thing off

I was thinking about poor Orac and his death crud, so I thought I’d do a little research for him.

I did a quick google search for holistic healing (call a doctor? Are you kidding?) and immediately found my answer–Pranic Healing.

First, I gotta tell you, it’s a deal–a steal, really–because you get knowledge, and no one can take that away from you. I mean, penicillin, you take it, you’re cured, and that’s it–nothing left, just “wham bam thank you ma’am”.

The Level One class is under $400.00. Compared to the expense of a doctors visit (about $80.00), and some online research from reputable medical sites (free), it’s, well–I’m crying, really.

Let’s look at the course description. Starting at the bottom:

This course is intended for Energy Healers, Physicians, Nurses, Chiropractors, Acupuncturists, Massage Therapists, or anyone interested in a safe and powerful energetic healing system.

Basically, anyone can take the class, as long as they are interested in a “safe and powerful energetic healing system.” What in the world?

Reduce Stress — Support Physical and Emotional Healing
The Pranic Healing Level 1 class teaches energetic scanning to balance the chakra system for healing simple and complex illnesses. A person’s energy field holds the template for the physical body. When the chakras in the energy field are balanced, the physical body is healthy.

MCKS Pranic Healing is taught directly and succinctly so that anyone, with or without energy training, or previous knowledge of energy healing can effect and support healing for oneself and for others.

Sweeping and energizing are taught as powerful healing techniques.

Energies are taught to be directed with intention.

Protocols are provided for healing many specific ailments from simple headaches to chronic disorders.

Learn distance healing and energetic hygiene.

Lovely, just lovely. Sounds so–weird.

Pranic Healing is an advanced form of energy medicine based on energy centers lying along the major acupuncture meridians.

So, to summarize, this is a “healing modality” based on ayurvedic ideas (chakras), and acupuncture meridians. Both ideas are complete bullshit. Recent studies have invalidated the already bizarre theory of acupuncture meridians, and ayurvedic medicine is just another untested, unproven “alternative” to real medicine.

So, should you take a class in Pranic Medicine? It seems obvious from where I sit, and I hope you feel a little closer to the answer.